Thursday, January 26, 2012


"Répondez, s'il vous plaît"....A French phrase meaning "please reply". We've all seen RSVP's on invitations, whether it be for a birthday party, a baby or bridal shower or an invitation to a wedding. But, do we all RSVP?

Since hosting many different types of parties at the tea room I have found that a lot of people do not reply to an invitation. It is proper etiquette to reply to the event host as soon as possible to let them know whether or not you will be able to attend so they can plan accordingly. There are many factors why a party hostess will need an accurate head count. They need to account for food, beverages, cake, seating, party favors and more.

What's the difference between RSVP and "regrets only"? When you see an RSVP on an invitation, that means the person sending the invitation would like you to respond with a yes or no. When the invitation states "regrets only", that means that the host wants you to let them know if you will not be attending. If you do not respond at all, the host will automatically assume you will be in attendance and they will include you in the headcount.

Personally, I think invitations should always request an RSVP. If a host is kind enough to invite you to an event , then it is just common courtesy to pick up the phone or even e-mail them to thank them for inviting you and let them know whether or not you can attend. They are spending quite a bit of money on invitations, food, decorations, entertainment, etc. so, the least the invited guest could do is simply respond.

If you are hosting the event then I would suggest putting an RSVP and a date to respond by on your invitation. Our tea room gets a final headcount four days prior to the event, so I would put an RSVP date for one week prior to your event. I also would not put "regrets only" if you are hosting an event that requires a headcount for food, beverages and seating. I think "regrets only" is fine if you are hosting a party at home and you have plenty of  food and beverages.

I would also include both a phone number and an e-mail address on your invitation for your RSVP. That way if the invited guest is unable to get in touch with you by phone, they can simply send a quick e-mail to respond to your invitation.

So the next time you receive an invitation to an event be sure to let the host know whether or not you can's just good manners and it makes planning so much easier.

1 comment:

  1. "Répondez, s'il vous plaît".... LOVE THIS Very Inportant to R.S.V.P teaching this to young girls At La Masion De Panache Finishing & Etiquette School THANKS!